Lent

Finally prayer moved from head to life

By Dcn. Everett Doxtator

	A Compass Lenten series

There have been many books and articles written about prayer. I have read many of them over the years. So what can I write about prayer that hasn't been written already?

I will start at the beginning of my prayer life as I remember it. I went to Catholic grade school. The thing that I remember the Sisters teaching us about prayer was the word ACTS. This was the way we remembered how to pray:

• Adoration;

• Contrition;

• Thanksgiving;

• Supplication.

Prayer wasn't really a part of my daily life when I was growing up. There were more important things to do like baseball, fishing, swimming and all the other things I did as a kid back in the '50s. The prayers we did were the usual ones: meal prayer, bedtime prayer and when there was a bad storm. As a kid I said them, but I could say that I didn't get much out of them. It was just something I did.

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It wasn't until my conversion experience that my prayer life started to change. As my faith deepened, so did my desire to seek a closer union with God. I read many books and articles about prayer that helped me pray better.

I explored different forms of prayer. All of them helped me, but I didn't seem to be getting any closer to God. My prayer always left me wondering: "Is this all there is?"

I wanted more. I wanted that communion with God that would give me that warm and fuzzy feeling. Once that was over I still felt empty.

I continued my search for communion with God. I started to study the Bible more (James 4:8: "Draw close to God, and he will draw close to you.").

I was wrong in the way I was trying to seek my communion with God; I was trying to get there by head knowledge. It was only when I moved my prayer from my head to my heart that I found what I was seeking.

In that searching, I also looked to my American Indian spirituality, which helped me come closer to God. I started learning about Oneida culture and its spirituality and how it fit in with my Christian faith. The ceremonies throughout the year remind me of God's love for me and to be thankful for what the Creator has done for me. All the ceremonies start out with the Thanksgiving prayer to the Creator who gives us everything.

The Lakota Sweat Lodge helps me see that we are all connected to one another. In the darkness of the Sweat Lodge there is no color, no race, just voices praying and singing to God. There is oneness and yet we each have our own spirituality that we bring to the ceremony.

I have a medicine wheel that I made to represent my spiritual belief. It has six colors - red, black, yellow and white to represent four races of people that go around the circle, which makes us one. I have green running horizontal across the circle to represent Mother Earth and my life on this earth. I have blue running vertically to represent my journey to God. Where the blue and green meet is when I am in balance with all of God's creation and with God.

My Christian faith, Oneida culture and Sweat Lodge all have helped me with my prayer life and to walk in harmony with all of God's creation.

(Dcn. Doxtator is the deacon at St. Joseph Parish, Oneida.)