Even the smallest are not forgotten

	S p e c i a l   S e c t i o n: Death and Dying
	Only in the Print Edition ... Articles found only in the special section of the Mar. 9, 2007 Compass print edition: • The Lord of life and of the dance of life     awaits us • Special days can hurt after death claims     loved one • New hospice will provide homes for 12     terminally ill • Prayer booklet remembers Alzheimer's     patients • Don't forget the ones left behind after     the funeral • Workshops and support groups help     the grieving • Estate planning takes more than a will • Church provides guidance on medical     power of attorney • Tips offered for what to say at a funeral • Subscribe to print edition

By Heather Chrudimsky
Compass Correspondent

It is perhaps the greatest tragedy - losing a baby by miscarriage or stillbirth.

Each year, more than 28,000 babies are stillborn in the United States. Joe Schinkten, owner of Ryan Funeral Home in Green Bay, is more than willing to do anything that he can to help parents during these times.

A miscarriage happens before the 20th week of pregnancy. Stillborn deaths happen after that time, but before birth. But regardless of when a parent loses a baby, there is great disappointment, loss and suffering.

In order to help, Ryan Funeral Home and St. Vincent Hospital in Green Bay partnered to offer burial services at no cost to families in the hope of easing the pain of their child's passing.

The partnership was started in the early 1960s by the late Bob Ryan and the then-administrator of St. Vincent's Hospital.

"They were discussing the situation one day after a round of golf." Schinkten said. "I do not recall the name of the former St. Vincent administrator. It was before I was even born."

When the services first started, Schinkten said there were a couple of hurdles, but continued dedication has made the program a success.

"One of the concerns was that the babies be buried on consecrated Catholic cemetery grounds, and the other was a cost issue," Schinkten said. "At no charge, our firm had quietly buried these babies for years at Mount Calvary Cemetery in De Pere, with no fanfare or services."

Burying the dead is one of the corporal acts of mercy, and Schinkten said his funeral home takes its responsibility to Christian society very seriously.

"We do not make a charge for this service and never will," he said.

As years passed, Schinkten said, burials were moved to Allouez Catholic Cemetery, where they also provide the burial space and grave digging at no cost.

Since its creation, the program has expanded to include all Green Bay area hospitals.

Over time, the Social Services Department at St. Vincent Hospital suggested that a memorial service be held for the families.

"We agreed," Schinkten said. "So four or five times a year, we have a common service of memorial at Allouez Catholic Cemetery, with burial following in the cemetery."

Ryan's services include picking up the babies' remains at the hospital, preparing them for burial, providing a casket for the common burial, transportation to the cemetery, taking part in the ecumenical memorial service at the cemetery chapel, and overseeing the burial service.

Schinkten said attendance can vary from several people to close 100.

"You see people from all walks of life, who share one common burden - the loss of an unborn baby," he said. "Very seldom do we have a dry eye after one of these services."

Schinkten said people from the four hospitals do a wonderful job bringing meaning and closure to a very sad situation.

"As with most funeral services, all we are doing is offering the family an opportunity to say goodbye in a personal, religious, time-honored and spiritual fashion," Schinkten said. "Pastoral Care at St. Vincent Hospital does an unbelievable job of facilitating this program," he added. "They are the stars, not us."

Schinkten said the partnership between Ryan and St. Vincent is important because of the continued dedication of both to serve the families of northeast Wisconsin.

"The loss of a baby is unbelievably personal in nature, gut-wrenching at best, and tries the very faith that we all treasure," Schinkten said. "The only way to move on is through the love and support that we can offer each other. It is all we have to give."